The big Sleep

Climbing the Mountain

by on Oct.04, 2013, under Diet&Food

Chocolate yoghurt cake and one day without flour, bread and other carbohydrates. The past month were not very interesting in progress. So I didn’t write.

A quick update: Youtube is my second home for knowledge. So I found Dr. Eric Berg. And he explains the four body types in connection to losing weight.
Dr. Berg on Youtube

Much of what he says corresponded to my own findings without proper explanation. The numerous hints I provided to physicians who did not want to hear the real clues to health. My health! But now I got the right info I can work with. The coming month will be one big experiment.

And my juices are not for the faint hearted. In the most bitter episode of my life, I now depend on bitter foods. ‘God makes strange jokes!’.
As diy-er I made Tzatziki shake, kale-onion-beet, bitter chocolate cake and combucha. All dark green, red substances. In order to reset all vital organs. No sugar, all fermented and raw foods. At least 6 meals a day. And the irony here is dr. Berg=’mountain’. He literarily provides a solution to climbing this huge mountain obstacle.

To be continued…

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Going Back to War

by on Jan.15, 2013, under Ramblings

It might be the slaughter hause or just plain back to war; is there any difference? Is there any dignity in it? For me the answer is still no. Dignity and all those nice clichés are more or less posed on someone by others with a more comfortable position. As if the naration helps to flat out what is skewed, wrong, One can be intelligent, cunning in one side of one’s life and dumb in another part. But even those words do not always help to heal the heart of great pains.

Coming back as hero substitute. Everybody has a story. Maybe people get paid to feel pain instead of themselves. I bet it would be a big business. A billion Dollar business. If you make someones life miserable and go on live your life, actually one has made a transaction of substitute pain. I am philosophical here, and none of it might be true or logic, but it ís an interesting view point.

Going back to war is going back to give a fight in a way it convinces you that you have done all possible steps. Retrace them.

I saw the movie ‘For Colored Girls'; it portrayed beautifully how black one can feel. Female black that is. As if blackness is an identity in itself. As if you can’t wash it off. Like a crime like something you know. I felt black as a little girl. I survived that war of stares, hair touches, praises of how white I was. Year passed and I even forgot about it, absorbed in things like career, female equality, prosperity and of course basic motherhood. Not the last and not the least.

The war is back. The blackness in disguise in things like hussling; and black became the new ‘cheat'; the cheats ‘whites’ do but not brag about it. I have nothing against caucasian people. I grew up between them. They are still a part of me, but I have been unwillingly caught up in the middle of the black-white-identity-war. Clouds just hanging over my head.

I earned my scars; and now as a granny. I look back at my life. Half of it. I coached my kids, raised them with lots of love and encouraged them to play the game well. The game of life needs fantasy, serendipity or just breathing.

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Master of the Game

by on Jan.09, 2013, under Diet&Food

Yesterday I suddenly saw a glimpse of light. An aha ‘Erlebnis’, I remembered magnesium. And thus I took a spoon of my horse treatment; pure christal magnesium. And see and behold a few hours later my knees slowely unlocked  a smile on my face. That day was already a roller coaster mood mover. But this morning I was going to walk anyway just to see what would be the deal for me.

Kane on my Ipod and the finish was Master of the Game. I still was in the game. I walked with less hickups but with pain from toes to hips. I made progress and good flex a little more.

As walking is a good exercise to open the mind I also remember that in case of blood the body has this mechanism where it protects the brain and heart against failure by limiting important flows to the arms and feet. That’s exactly why I use my ankles at the signal tokens for inbalance of nutrition. Low T3 is signaled first in my ankles. Also the same for my arms and hands.

A third idea that popped my mind after seeing a mother and son on the news ( they only ate raw food); I have never seen a veganist (at least not many as I can remember) who was fat. So this new year started with an increase of raw food intake. Although it might mean I get a huge sugar crash later on because until now I have not been able to make it pass that point. It is a turning point where the brains and body take over and I suddenly can not do more than eat….you guessed right…..suger!!! So I have to fool my brains in order to make it work. I haven’t seen fat people from raw fruits and vegetables; thus the first experiment will be to find raw suckery foods. Just to temper the sugar sucker

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by on Jan.07, 2013, under Diet&Food

Meds are like cocktails if shaken well together we feel happy….and thus I’m going to shake it up some. I’ve been a week without meds now and I feel better. Great is not the word because I had nausea, and very very painful muscles. A sign that the meds are accumulating and something is not processed or used properly within the body. So I cleaned my body (not totally done yet). It helped after three days, walking was much better and I could flex my legs a little. It’s quite silly that I lost all my progress in 1 day.

As 2013 arrived I decided to go on with the record taking. The quantified self (but much more about that later) is an interesting project. You can Google if you want and see what it is all about. It will be the seed that will make Healthcare eventually cheaper or more inline with the individual. The future is always in the past and revealed to us in the present. But it is never in the future!

But philosophy is for another blog. This is just the dirty raw reality of the aftermath of human intervention in health. And such it is a bit vital for diy historians, recordkeepers and quantifiers because we have to build many of the data sources ourselves.

Anyway (love that word) today is the first day of my new experiment; a new cocktail of meds. Only a few pills that make or brake this life. My Life! that is….Still valuable for me! (just in case a stray physician reads my ramblings). I haven’t decided yet what I am going to take, but my intuition is giving me signals. I do like the background processing skills of my brain. They are always right and I’m often wrong when I ignore them. So I go with the information my body tells me and since it has emerging properties I think my best bet is to go with the background processing of my thoughts.

To be continued….

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The Ride goes on

by on Jan.04, 2013, under Ramblings

Christmas gone, New Year arrived with of course a new fight for energy. I don’t know how long a recovery may take, but for me it is still a rough ride in search of a better balance. It is a kind of stamina that one has. These survival features pop up when needed; kinda cool that is. Let them keep coming as it is another step in my personalized marathon. First things first – adding a little creativity to my life to spice things up in 2013.

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Spartan ways

by on Aug.20, 2012, under Ramblings

Well it is a bumpy ride; ever since two weeks I’m tortured with muscle pains. From my fingers, arms, hip and legs. Lately with severe back pain as well.

But in the weekend my creativity spiked. I forced myself in every odd child way position sitting on the floor. Stretching hamstrings, hips, back and legs. Surely a rigorous spartan solution.

Sometimes the pain was accompanied by nausea and thus I eat soup, oatmeal and white rice constantly. Keeping focus is all that mattered. My walking improved a little. All that said I guess ballet or pilates is a very good body fitness goal as both strengthen the muscles while stretching them.

My notebook is placed in such a way that I can hold the stretch positions for at least 15 minutes. It worked! Another spike in creativity – and I took my yoga math to my bedroom; placed it above another one and put two curly pillows in top. The dreads are hard and give massage like movements.

During the night it all came together as a good decision. The worst pain died off. It will probably take me weeks to stretch everything to almost normal.

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Silent tuning

by on Aug.09, 2012, under Ramblings

What is a health report when it starts sounding like a nasty bug? Nothing worth to repeat! And so I took a frustrating long holisleepy-day; that – in case you were following my ramblings – meant I suddenly disappeared offline.

Like vampires who hide from the light; some people just flip flop from the spotlight. And for me that means, sleep, sliding away.…a secret tuning spree for me alone with exercise, discipline, meds and food.

It worked hurray! And for those who are curious how you can recover a lot from thyroid cancer and the aftermath; stay tuned. I got a lot to tell. And mind you; I didn’t say I got completely healthy! Because I did not; there’s no holy grail!

Anywayzz I am glad to be back and for the fact I did not close this blog. It’s a humble account and journey from darkness to the sun. I’ve learned dancing in the rain.

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Happy New Year!

by on Jan.02, 2012, under Ramblings

Yep it’s here; after a few weeks of autistic silence the words start flowing again. And I reached 2012. 46 more years lie ahead of me. Akward but challenging. Each year with less turbulence and more controll by less controlling. You know it has something to do with the flow of life.

Cyto will still be around coaching me through the last load of kilo’s. This weight loss challenge is on. And in my mind unfold Salsa, Flamengo and other delicious moves. Which reminds me of Britney Spears, who was a little past her due date on stage…Obviously having difficulty with her moves after rehab. Well I can’t say much about that because recovering is a lot like rehab; sucks too.

23:35 a good time to switch to my gossip diary and get some sleep…

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