I just woke up for the second time. As a true Amazon warrior I have made it true the night. My carefully anti faint plan succeeded one hundred percent. I did not had to leave my bed for a ‘death rehearsal’.

Anyway my only weaponry where two pills. On 10:04 pm yesterday I feel the change rapidly sweeping through my body. Until than I had one protein drink, two ounce of pork, nauseous making English sweets and some cola. Every bite locks down my stomach. So I had for the shower and call it the day.

Still happy though of my progress with the CrowdHelp crime news project. I did not say ‘mine’ cuz I’m learning. Dragons don’t like emotionally attachment and this wannabe Amazon Special Force recruit (hey let me keep my fantasy *grin* here) wants to see it materialize. The mind is a great weapon for enlighting taboo. The thumb for history accounting.

Back to my agony. ‘Suffer in silence soldier!’ Absolutely true. You don’t hear a sound over here on the Net. So I jumped into bed (not really) and fell in a deep sleep.

Limbs to heavy to move, my breath sinks deeper into the cave zone of twilight. I see myself in this weird movie. Sitting on a double bed in a square room. I locked myself up for this orange black striped tiger. It is on the loose and hunting me ferociously. In a not so smart attempt to escape I switch the light off.

Strangely the tiger is blended with the character of the cop of GTST; a Dutch soap airing on working days. So I find myself facing a dilemma while my heart throws itself at its cage walls. I’m in totally panic. A knife as large as my under arm hidden under my pillow. My arms sweep like trees in storm winds holding to large sticks. I’m ready for my death struggle.

A storm bouncing heart signals my brain to wake up. I get fed up with this nightmare. My mind slips in and out in deeper death sleep. All energy is concentrated when I surface full consciousness. 11:35 pm I wake up with a heart trying to escape from my chest.

The medicine work for ninety percent. I feel strange. I taste vomit in my mouth and I keep slipping in and out death sleep. But I don’t want to go there! The darkness of the night will make it worse. So half conscious, half sleeping as a blind person I reach for the light switch between the wood of wires of gadget planet.

My heart, a clock that ticks every agonizing second away finally gets what it needs to slow down. Light! My room is brightened with a day light bulb. I feel the dizziness, choking and gravity pull from death sleep become less. So I write my comments as a meditation. After one hour I dare to go back to sleep. The light still on so my brain will use the tiny particles to keep track of life itself. I cover my eyes and ears with a cap and my captured inner soul returns back to sleep.

This time revisiting Gooi and Out of Africa in the same time. But that adventure with the Muslim family and their generous hospitality is left for next times.

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