The last two weeks have been a silent revolution. After more than 6 years I am capable of digesting milk. HURRAY!!!!!!!!!
Absolutely fabulous. And not only milk, but rind and peppers too. My food pattern changed and I live mostly on milk products, vegetables and fish.

All this should be a recipe for weight loss….and you guessed right; it isn’t. The last thing I want is too eat more food. More digestion and burning is what I want. Even though I can do more things I have to keep my pace at turtle speed. Not an impressive speed; but it works….duh.

Thus my wish list has still a few items left. Exercise, muscles, sleep, memory and flu. These functions are still impaired. I feel like a baby. Drinking milk, learning to use your muscles again and learning to walk and learn. All these human features I had to do again. It has been a major cognitive and identity challenge.

Body and self image is a thing of memory, prediction and anticipation. With the two out of balance you walk like an alien. And you get an out of body experience. A me mind in a strange, someone’s else’s body.

So I traveled a long and lonely road of pure self absorption – of course I have my children and a few friends – but this process had such a huge impact on me. It can’t be imagined without the experience. I learned a lot about endocrinology, fysiology and brains. At least my curious mind had first seats on this roller coaster theater.

And thus this expedition will continue in search of the last frontier. My energy should be as two buckets. One always full and the other one filled accordingly to my needs. I haven’t figured that one out yet. So the big question remains how to mimic the balance system with inflexible medicines?

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